Now I lay me down to sleep...

“Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep....”

 These words have taught me how to pray, have helped me when the dark monster was coming after me in the night and the noises of silence haunted me. As I have grown I still find when I whisper my own silent prayers I always seem to mouth  “Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep” and then I go on to my "grown up" prayer I guess you could call it. It’s funny that some how over the years I have managed to forget the exact words to the rest of that prayer. I can some what remember it so I used the amazing tool google and found what the rest of that prayer said and the many, many versions of these “night night” prayers as I always called them. Some go on to say “should I die before the night, I pray the Lord my soul to take." others say “that Angels watch me through the night and keep me safe till morning light”; I believe this is the one I said the most.

  These simple prayers have provided comfort, peace and hope through the dark. As an adult, my dark has become darker and the monster has became a reality as the demonic forces long to attack the children of God. But we serve a God that will not allow this. This morning I woke up and while getting ready for church I was thinking about how silly I still am about my night night prayers. It has become one of mine and Blake’s most sacred times. He is so patient and sweet that he waits on me to wash my face and go through my ridiculously long regiment of getting ready for bed, and then we have our time with God together, finishing our day with prayer and communication with our heavenly father. I will admit Blake gets offended because sometimes I fall asleep when he has a lot on his mind to talk with Jesus about and I’m sure he does the same to me and simply wakes up to catch me say amen. I used to always feel so bad because I would sometimes fall asleep when saying my prayers but as I was thinking this morning about my relationships in life and my relationship with God, He showed me a little something. 

As long as I can remember one of my favorite memories growing up were the times before bed that I would spend with my parents. I can remember my dad saying “come on girl, come get your arm” which was his arm. As I would lay there we would talk and talk. We have had the silliest conversations to the conversations parents never want to have with their children; as I had moved back home as a widow and the nights and evil thoughts haunted me while my life appeared to be the nightmare I could never escape. Even my brother loved hanging out and talking at night, I can remember as kids we always wanted to be together. I had my own room but I can remember more nights in his top bunk bed and him on the bottom bunk than I can remember in my own bed and even as we grew up he would come and talk to me when he got in most nights. We talked about everything and looking back, those memories, those conversations and those giggles are worth so much to me. The night before Allen and Justin went to be with our Father, he stood in our earthly parents room after my dad cut his hair and he did just like he had done so many nights, he talked and talked to my parents. From what they said he did not seem to care he had to get up at the crack of dawn the next morning, he was just so excited about life and was so full of life. He was a married man so these times naturally did not happen as much but they meant and mean now so much to my parents. As life goes on we move out and those conversations at night may not always happen as much. Sadly, I realize for many children  these sweet moments and conversations never happen and they go to bed only speaking to siblings or no one at all  because the parents are not home. The stresses of the economic pressure have them working or they simply do not realize that each and every moment with a child is a gift from God. 

As I thought about my time with God at night I thought about all of this, and I realized not for the first time that I have been so very blessed. I also came back to the fact that I had forgotten the words to the once memorized prayer. I came to the realization that I had probably forgotten it because I fell asleep before I got to the next verse.oops! lol. Thinking back on all the nights I have found myself not able to sleep as Satan still to this day attempts to torment me with negative thoughts when I close my eyes, when everything goes silent, and the dark comes. Every  single one of the nights all have the same thing in common; I crawled into my heavenly fathers arms like a big baby running from night time monsters and talked out my problems, my fears and my worries. I gave them to him to fight and to carry. I prayed and stayed in his arms until he rocked me right on to sleep with his peace and grace. When I finally awoke, the night was over and joy had come in the morning. 

While I think about the stresses of life and I watch as this world and nation drift further and further away from the one true God, Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior; I know that others I’m sure are being tormented just like I am. If you are not a believer or if you are, you may not even realize what is happening, but the devil is real and he is working over time because he knows his time is short. Please know that even if you don’t know your earthly father, you don’t have a relationship with him or whatever the case may be that we still have a great big Father out there that wants a personal relationship with you and with each and everyone of us! He wants to hold us in his arms and cover us in his peace. He wants us to run to him when things get dark and life gets hard, and at the same time he wants us to talk to him when things are going great and we are just simply thankful for everything he is doing.

         God has shown me so much this past year and has revealed so much to me as Blake and I have had to search for a church home while we are at Fort Rucker and  I’ll just tell you it has been hard! But I believe people have complicated Christianity and having a relationship with Christ. Yes, I firmly believe the road to Heaven is narrow but I believe that it is still a very simple process. God wants and desires a very REAL, authentic relationship with his children, he wants us to talk about everything in our life, and when we mess up and screw up, he wants us to come to him and let him fix it. I also believe he desires from us real thanksgiving and real worship. As we worship and spend time with him, he fixes everything else because we realize how completely amazing he is and we learn that we want to be just like him! Have you ever met someone that just really made an impression on you and you thought "this person has it all"? They seem to have it all together and you just wish you could be like them. I know that may sound cheesy to some but everyone does this. We watch Hollywood or I am guilty of looking at other women who appear so beautiful, like they have it all together; beautiful family, sweet,  love God and just an all around great person. Don’t get me wrong I believe God puts some amazing people in our lives to be great role models so to speak, and honestly I have a lot of Godly women and people I look up to, but really, really, more than I should look to others, I should look to God! I should study his word and desire to be like him! He sets the standard of perfection and the more we study and learn how he handles situations, how he loves and he offers peace, the more we desire to be like him. Let me be clear, we will never achieve perfection! We will never be him or his equal and we will never be worthy of his love but that's when he offers grace and love beyond comprehension. And just like it meant so much to my parents when Allen and I would spend time and communicate with them, just like it means so much to any person and any real relationship when we communicate; It means even more to our Heavenly Father, King of Kings and Holy God! 

          There’s a beautiful song we sing at the church we attend here in Enterprise. It has really challenged me and I believe it is a great example of how God wants our relationship with him to be. I wish you could hear it put to music but the words in themselves are beautiful and so true.

“ You said seek and you’ll find,

 So I’ll come running after you;

 You said stay for a while

 I’ll reveal my heart to you; 

I love, I love, I love to bring you praise, 

I love, I love, I love to bring you praise 

with all I am... 

You said pray and not cease; 

so to your cross I bow my knee

 you said ask and receive,

 As you speak your will to me;

 I long, I long, I long to see your face,

 I long, long, I long to see you face 

With all I am....

 So I will love you, There’s none above you, 

You are my everything ,

 So I will love you, There’s none beside you, 

You take my breath away....”

           I challenge you this week to spend a little time with God. As you lay down, shut your eyes and your list of to dos, bills to pay, deadlines to meet, kids events, projects, deployments, health problems, sickness in a love one, marital problems, relationship problems, and even death of a loved one may flood your thoughts, Satan may try to use these against you. He would love for us to drown in fear and worry or suffocate in our problems.  It's so easy to get away from these attacks and if you don't know what else to say and your heart is too broken, start small, be real and be transparent. God does not require us to have a fancy prayer with words we never use in real life. A simple prayer while laying in bed can put your mind to rest and bring peace to your soul more than you ever imagined. Yes, there are times, many times we have to learn to put on our boxing gloves and go to war against Satan as we allow God to teach us to become that prayer warrior, but we have to start somewhere. I will leave you with this; Some may say it is wrong to fall asleep before finishing our nightly prayers. I think of it a couple of ways, first of all rest is a good thing and I believe when we let our bodies get physically weary we do not always think clearly and we set ourselves up for Satan's attacks. God speaks of rest many times in scripture and I believe it is one of the many ways he helps us. We think, listen and function much better after a good nights rest. Also I don’t have a child yet, but I imagine when I am blessed to have one of my own, that a very precious time will be when I hold them in my arms as they sleep. Unlike a child outgrows a parents arms and lap physically, we NEVER outgrow the arms of God! 
Have a blessed week!

Matthew 11:28-29

 “…Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” 

Deuteronomy 33:27
The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms. 

1 Coronicles 16:11

Seek the Lord and his strength, seek his face continually.


Psalms 145:18-19
The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.He will fulfil the desire of them that fear him: he also will hear their cry, and will save them.

Philippians 4:6
Be careful for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your request be made known to God.

1 Thessalonians 5:17
Pray without ceasing.