May 30th 2009 (1 year)

       Wow! I can’t believe summer has come and gone so fast. Where did it go? School gets kicked off this week and once school starts the year seems to fly by! I have had an amazing summer. Its amazing how in the midst of our busy schedules, appointments, classes, stress and hurt God still manages to let us see the rays of sunshine, feel the warmth and embrace of his spirit, and smell his oh, so sweet aroma that covers this earth! I was blessed to take a few trips this summer that were amazing. I went on my first cruise at the beginning of the summer! My mother and father in law are great and were nice enough to take me. It was great! I have never laid out and ate so much in my life! It was a great time to bond and enjoy each others company. My sister in law Jenna is amazing! ;-) 
     A couple of weeks later, a day I dreaded for a year was quickly approaching. Like I said it’s amazing how fast time flies. It was May 30th. This is the year date of my husband and brothers deaths. Times like these you never know how you are going to feel or handle the situation. Although we know God can bring us through anything, our human flesh takes over sometimes and we just don’t know if we are going to make it another day. Thank God that He puts people in our life to carry and hold our hand every step of this crazy journey through life. I have been blessed with the most amazing friends a girl could ask for! As the date drew nearer, I had so many different emotions and feelings going on inside of my head and heart. At times I would feel so broken and tell myself “ok on that day I’m just going to sit in my room and cry all day.” Awful idea, I know. Other times I would tell myself I’m just going to be everyone’s support. This I have discovered is my weakness. I have the personality that I think I must “fix” everyone and help them. This can be great but when I don’t focus on letting “Leslie heal”, I’m of no use to any one else. But that was thought #2, I need to be home so I could be there for everyone else. Then thought #3 came in. Me and my best friends would take a trip together. My parents didn’t like this idea very much because it started off with me and my girl friends wanting to go to Tennessee and camp in a tent! Well first of all we have no clue how to even put a tent up, secondly, we could get eaten by something or killed by someone and thirdly, my parents naturally dreaded me driving on the roads on May 30th. But after many prayers and thoughts, I decided a trip was exactly what I need! I had never taken a trip with just my friends, all on our own. 
        We left on Wednesday, May 27th and drove to Nashville, Tn. We got dressed, went out and saw Blake Shelton out!! We were like little girls having a crush on a silly boy band! We secretly took pictures and ended up talking to his best friend. We got up the next day went to the Country Music Hall of Fame, which in Justin’s words would have been “So Awesome!” He was a HUGE George Strait and Johnny Cash fan. They now are a huge part of my music collection. We left from Nashville and drove to a little town called Benton, Tn. We stayed in the most beautiful cabin. I seriously could have stayed there forever. We were about 25 minutes from the Ocoee. So we drove up and went mountain biking in the national forest, kayaking on the Ocoee Lake and the last day (May 30th) rafted down the Ocoee! I loved every minute of it!

        The last time I went rafting down the Ocoee I was with Justin and the time before that I was with Allen. I can’t begin to put into words the peace God allows us to have at times, but it was as if they were there with me, having a blast. I can so vividly picture them laughing trying to throw me in the river. It seemed just when I was about to have a melt down I could here their voices saying “Leslie we taught you how to have fun! We taught you how to laugh and enjoy life, so enjoy it! Its okay to smile today, it’s okay to be simply okay and happy!” I will never forget that day and the words I know God allowed my spirit to hear. I had a peace I can’t describe. God also placed great Christian friends in my life, Amber and Natalie you girls were troopers! Thank you so much for going with me! God knows what we need and He knows when we need it. His timing is perfect! After all He invented time! 
         Needless to say a weekend that I dreaded turned out to be an amazing, life changing weekend! We were surrounded by Gods beautiful creation and nature. A wonderful past teacher used to tell me “Everything in the Natural reflects the Spiritual and everything in the Spiritual reflects the Natural” This is so true. The mountains, the river, the trees, the lake, the animals all reflect God and his perfection! If you ever have a chance to just take in His creation I promise it can be life changing! During this trip God taught me that although it was hard and terrible, He brought me through this past year and if I can make it this far, there is hope I can make it in the future! 

*Jeremiah 29:11* “For I know the plan I have for you” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” I hold true to these words!
Thanks Jerry!